Ahmad’s Journal

To be clear, a fat bunda is the focus of Damilare Kuku’s second book, Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow – I mean, it’s in the name – but it definitely cuts into issues deeper than cosmetic concerns. Nearly All The Men In Lagos Are Mad, her first book, was a collection of short stories centring […]

There comes a point in every young adult’s life where you realise that apart from being your parents’ child, you’re your own person. Maybe you realise that you want to start dipping your bread in tea, even though your parents are vehemently against it, even though they plead with you not to go down this […]

Everyone knows how relationships are supposed to go. You meet someone, compare your madness to their own, and then decide if you want to be doing “Good Morning Baby” and “You didn’t call me before you slept” with them. This is also when you change their name in your phone from the one their mother […]

Africa has always been a mother. It’s undisputed. So much so, that science tells us most non-Africans alive today can trace their ancestry back to the continent. Our continent. Africa also has the world’s youngest population, with 70% of sub-Saharan Africa under the age of 30. We have over 2,000 languages – making Africa an […]

You are ugly. At least, that’s what the internet wants you to think before you start a glow-up journey. The person often shown at the beginning of those viral glow-up videos on TikTok is usually the messiest version of themselves, but through movie magic or a satisfying time-lapse, they become Beyonce. (That is an exaggeration, […]

A new pandemic is currently rearing its hideous head in Nigeria. And no, it’s not the quietly nasty cholera outbreak that’s moving through the country. We’re talking about Sexual Harassment.  Just like the cholera wahala – and the ebola one before it – the genesis of recent conversations about Sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV) is […]

You know how people load their plates at a buffet? That’s how Nigerians are picking up side hustles (mostly for the added income sha). And if you’re reading this, you probably want to know a thing or two about how to make more money. The most straightforward formula for growing wealth is to increase your […]

Sometimes, even against all your most fervent efforts, Nigeria will body slam you into a brick wall and there is nothing you can do about it. Pele, dear, it happens. It’s not news that things are somehow right now. Inflation o, security o, electricity o, it’s getting harder and harder to point out something in […]

If there’s one thing Nigerians love, it’s bread. Duh. After that, it’s beauty. Think about it, when was the last time you went to a party – no matter how small or lowkey – and didn’t see women done up and bejewelled like freshly unearthed pirate treasure? According to Nairametrics, the African Beauty and Personal […]

There are certain times in every young Nigerian’s life when you must confront your God and ask them what you did to deserve such a dangerous reality (living in this country). You might even wake up at midnight to speak with your creator. When no cars are driving by, all your talking stages are asleep, […]